This is what I have to say not just to those girls and to LDS girls every where. And if you aren't LDS, hear me out anyway. Everyone has values.
"RM" is a TITLE. When looking for someone, you need to find a guy who not only has the RM title, but also the CHARACTER. Now, don't get me wrong. He can have the character, but not the title. If that is okay with you, that is wonderful. Not everyone has to serve a mission to be worthy in your eyes.
But he should NEVER have just the title. He absolutely must have the character to match, or you are only fooling yourself. Do not stick with a guy just because you think you can help him back into the Church.
IT IS NOT YOUR JOB TO SAVE HIM. THAT IS THE LORD'S JOB.
So many girls get hurt because they fall for guys that need what they call "saving." But, let me tell you from experience, it ends up being you who needs saved. There is a very small percentage of girls who actually bring their guys back into the Church. It is usually the girls who end up abandoning their true wants and wishes for someone who just doesn't measure up.
Look for someone whose core values line up with yours, and do not settle for anything less than that. Don't settle for a guy just because he is a GUY. Try to find out about yourself.
Love yourself first. If you respect yourself, you will want a guy who respects you. The "guy element" in your life is a nice touch, but you don't need a
relationship to define you.
Stop dating such losers, so that when the right guy comes along you don't have to worry about excess baggage or feeling like you aren't good enough for him because of who you have dated in the past.
You are a daughter of God. Find a true son of God who loves you for YOU. Find someone who doesn't want one thing about you changed, and vice versa. Everyone has their faults. No one is perfect. The guy you look for needs to be someone who makes you want to be something other than who you are now.
Maybe there really are wonderful guys on this earth.
I hate to say it, but I had almost given up hope on the RMs in this world. I have felt so sad when RMs carry the title, but not the character, and girls fall for them like a ton of bricks and they can't see how much they are being hurt, and how much they are missing. I hated how I kept finding myself stuck with guys who just weren't what I thought--or hoped--they could be.
I decided to stop looking for an RM with both the title and the character, because I was convinced that nowadays there just might not be such a thing. I decided just to focus on myself and learn to love who I was, and just forget about guys with the RM title and character. And guess what?
I found one.
I hope that you will, too.
Don't give up. Don't short-change yourself. You deserve to be loved.
Find someone whom you don't have to feel guilty for loving.
